Rose-Colored Glasses
One thing I've never been accused of being (at least to my face) is a drama queen. I just don't do drama. Never have. Never will.
I remember sitting in my office one day, listening to a couple of co-workers talk about how much drama some people have in their lives. I chimed in, "I don't have any drama in my life."
One of the girls stared at me, mouth open, eyebrows raised.
"What?" I asked her.
Her reply gave me something to think about for many days to come.
"You have more drama than anyone else I know!"
I did a mental rundown:
One daughter married and divorced and just miscarried a precious baby; another daughter with more financial woes than I can talk about; another daughter was unmarried with a young child; a son in the military - possibly would be deploying soon; another son in jail; a son who at 17 just found out he was a father; and (thank you, Jesus!) a son who was content being trouble-free.
I didn't see any drama there. Not from my perspective. I saw life. Life full of messy things - some happy, some sad, but no drama. I held my chin up and put that 'drama-free' feather in my cap.
That's not necessarily a bad thing...right?
That's been a couple years ago. Just recently, God has shown me that I look at life through 'rose-colored' glasses; minimizing my pain, denying problems, pushing through with blinders on, when sometimes He is trying to get me to slow down and allow these issues in life to be a catalyst for change.
I've said time and time again, that God must think I'm a wimp because He hasn't sent many trials my way...there's those rose-colored glasses again. When in essence, my life story would read like a best-selling novel, with plot twists and turns, villains and heroes, and joy and pain throughout. But I've never looked at my life that way. In fact, God has shown me that it's my sinful pride that causes me to say that I haven't had trials or drama in my life.
What God is calling me to do is to remove the rose-colored glasses and be totally honest with Him about the pain, the heartbreak, the disappointments, the frustration, the fear, the valleys, and the storms of life. I have to stop pretending that life has been one big mountain-top experience and let God in to the hidden places where I've stuffed those memories as far back in the closet of my heart as I possibly could. God wants to heal the wounds. And more importantly, He wants to use those wounds as a ministry to help others.
All the pain and suffering in life would be for naught if I tuck it away, denying it's presence and certainly it's affect on my life. It would be in vain. And that's not why God allowed those things to happen to me. He sent me through battles to come out on the other side and help a sister through behind me. There's no victory in pretending the battle never happened.
God often uses music to speak to my heart, and there's a beautiful song out by a contemporary Christian group called Sidewalk Prophets. I love the song and have heard it a hundred times before, but after God and I had a chat about the rose-colored glasses, this song took on a whole new meaning to me.
God is so loving and tender. And He has assured me that He will be gentle with my heart as together, we pry open the boxes that I have so tightly sealed shut, and unpack each memory and in the light of His eternal glory, see what can be done with them.
I want to share the words of the song with you and a link to the video so you can enjoy it with me.
"Keep Making Me"
*****************************
If you have painful memories packed away, I hope that you will join me on this journey as we seek to be beautifully broken and used by God.
Be blessed.
I remember sitting in my office one day, listening to a couple of co-workers talk about how much drama some people have in their lives. I chimed in, "I don't have any drama in my life."
One of the girls stared at me, mouth open, eyebrows raised.
"What?" I asked her.
Her reply gave me something to think about for many days to come.
"You have more drama than anyone else I know!"
I did a mental rundown:
One daughter married and divorced and just miscarried a precious baby; another daughter with more financial woes than I can talk about; another daughter was unmarried with a young child; a son in the military - possibly would be deploying soon; another son in jail; a son who at 17 just found out he was a father; and (thank you, Jesus!) a son who was content being trouble-free.
I didn't see any drama there. Not from my perspective. I saw life. Life full of messy things - some happy, some sad, but no drama. I held my chin up and put that 'drama-free' feather in my cap.
That's not necessarily a bad thing...right?
That's been a couple years ago. Just recently, God has shown me that I look at life through 'rose-colored' glasses; minimizing my pain, denying problems, pushing through with blinders on, when sometimes He is trying to get me to slow down and allow these issues in life to be a catalyst for change. I've said time and time again, that God must think I'm a wimp because He hasn't sent many trials my way...there's those rose-colored glasses again. When in essence, my life story would read like a best-selling novel, with plot twists and turns, villains and heroes, and joy and pain throughout. But I've never looked at my life that way. In fact, God has shown me that it's my sinful pride that causes me to say that I haven't had trials or drama in my life.
What God is calling me to do is to remove the rose-colored glasses and be totally honest with Him about the pain, the heartbreak, the disappointments, the frustration, the fear, the valleys, and the storms of life. I have to stop pretending that life has been one big mountain-top experience and let God in to the hidden places where I've stuffed those memories as far back in the closet of my heart as I possibly could. God wants to heal the wounds. And more importantly, He wants to use those wounds as a ministry to help others.
All the pain and suffering in life would be for naught if I tuck it away, denying it's presence and certainly it's affect on my life. It would be in vain. And that's not why God allowed those things to happen to me. He sent me through battles to come out on the other side and help a sister through behind me. There's no victory in pretending the battle never happened.
God often uses music to speak to my heart, and there's a beautiful song out by a contemporary Christian group called Sidewalk Prophets. I love the song and have heard it a hundred times before, but after God and I had a chat about the rose-colored glasses, this song took on a whole new meaning to me.
God is so loving and tender. And He has assured me that He will be gentle with my heart as together, we pry open the boxes that I have so tightly sealed shut, and unpack each memory and in the light of His eternal glory, see what can be done with them.
I want to share the words of the song with you and a link to the video so you can enjoy it with me.
"Keep Making Me"
Make me broken
So I can be healed
'Cause I'm so calloused
And now I can't feel
I want to run to You
With heart wide open
Make me broken
Make me empty
So I can be filled
'Cause I'm still holding
Onto my will
And I'm completed
When you are with me
Make me empty
[Chorus:]
'Til You are my one desire
'Til You are my one true love
'Til You are my breath, my everything
Lord, please keep making me
Make me lonely
So I can be Yours
'Til I want no one
More than You, Lord
'Cause in the darkness
I know You will hold me
Make me lonely
[Chorus]
'Til You are my one desire
'Til You are my one true love
'Til You are my breath, my everything
Lord, please keep making,
I know You'll keep making
Lord, please keep making me
So I can be healed
'Cause I'm so calloused
And now I can't feel
I want to run to You
With heart wide open
Make me broken
Make me empty
So I can be filled
'Cause I'm still holding
Onto my will
And I'm completed
When you are with me
Make me empty
[Chorus:]
'Til You are my one desire
'Til You are my one true love
'Til You are my breath, my everything
Lord, please keep making me
Make me lonely
So I can be Yours
'Til I want no one
More than You, Lord
'Cause in the darkness
I know You will hold me
Make me lonely
[Chorus]
'Til You are my one desire
'Til You are my one true love
'Til You are my breath, my everything
Lord, please keep making,
I know You'll keep making
Lord, please keep making me
*****************************
If you have painful memories packed away, I hope that you will join me on this journey as we seek to be beautifully broken and used by God.
Be blessed.
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